Struggle.

"You have left me so long to struggle against death, alone, that I feel and see only death! I feel like death!" Chapter 30, pg. 268-269

Hell.

Hells afloat in lovers tears.

Repair the Damages.

I was broken
But my maker wanted me fixed.
The invisible hands of fate heard its call,
And began to fix me piece by piece.
Paying close attention to detail, to ensure that it doesn't come apart as quickly as before.
And day by day I began to feel more human than zombie.
Though the heart strings that were broken aren't mended,
Just temporarily bound together tight around my heart,
Squeezing out old feelings of left over love and hate.
Though now i'm left as a emotionless empty shell.
A doll, all new but still not fully fixed.

To do list.

1. Comprar amor para harinar en abundancia con felicidad
2. Descambiar tristeza
3. No tener perjuicios con los demás
4. Fijar tu atención en los pequeños detalles de la vida
5. Ser feliz con lo que tenemos
6. Olvidar la tristeza
7. Canjear la añoranza por una sonrisa
8. No pensar en momentos fallidos
9. Recordar los buenos momentos

Winter souls.

Summer is ending, And with it the magic of summer love.

Winter comes swiftly, Summer lovers are driven apart by closeness and some make their own personal summer. Killing all the flowers, The rose with in its dying beauty singing the remains of love songs turned laments. The winter seeming to last forever for lovers, But winter ends for them, Winter doesnt end for the lonely. The coldness creeps into their hearts and mind filling their ears with words of eternal suffering demanding justice, The cold setting in their heart freezing their soul and enveloping them in a cocoon of solitude and misery.
No one wants to be near the winter souls, For fear of it spreading.

Half-life.

How was I suppose to live without?
I didnt plan that, but now that I am living without, I realize that I can live without even if it is half living. I don't even love him anymore, I have no other feeling for this inhuman man other than disappointment and disguist.
Though I do miss love, the feeling of being needed, Loved...
Through all of this mess I tread water now, Not drowning, but not living comfortably, But at least im still alive.
It is sad when I wake up in the morning and the only thought that gets me through the day is sleeping and dreaming again that night.
But even in dreams, Im alone.